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Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Distant

I am here, I am alive, I am sorry that I am/have been distant.
I haven't been leaving comments, but I have been reading.
I know that one of my blog goals was to one day have 50 comments.
I know I WILL NEVER have 50 comments if I am not posting or commenting myself.
But really ... why do I want those 50 comments?!
What would that prove or mean?!
I can not spell, I am not good at expressing myself and mostly I write about boring baby stuff.
So why is it that I want 50 comments?!
I dunno - just did.
Today right now I am letting that GO!
I am GOOD with letting it go!
I am over wanting 50 comments.
I am still having problems "loving" my son.
He is getting better, So many more times a day I do love him.
He still has very bad days, but they are only about 1 time in a week.
He is so darn cute I could kiss him to death.
(lucky for us and him he is cute, I don't know how I would love him if not, haha)
Then he starts screaming, Tatum starts screaming and it is a mad house.
I really think Tatum starts screaming to get more attention than him ... even though she is SPOILED ROTTEN and gets SO MUCH attention!
But with that being said ... blogging is on my back burner, I do read ... I read my blog roll everyday! I am sorry I have not commented ... I am here with you all!
Love you - miss you all and I am praying for all of you! Please pray for me too!
This week we went BACK to the Dr with Bowden. We tried the 5th formula, and then the 6th. The 5th he was allergic to ... that stopped after bottle 2 ... we are also on a new "spasm" med. Also back on the Axid ... which I think does not help his sleeping, but I really think he is in pain ... and the ONLY pain the Dr thinks it can be is acid reflux. SO ... trial and error again ... we are now on a soy formula. Can't tell if it is working yet! Tatum was a extremely happy baby I do not and CAN not expect Bowden to be that happy but I can PRAY for him to be comfortable. I fear every am, afternoon and evening that there is SOMETHING wrong that we are missing!
Night Night for now ... I am open for some hugs, kisses and prayers!

9 comments:

kimmyk said...

i hope bowden's new formula works. how frustrating to feel helpless.

i am sending good sleepy time vibes your way...good healing vibes your way...along with some feelings of peace.

love ya chickie.

The Smith Family said...

I pray that Bowden's new formula works for him and he is able to be pain free. Poor little guy. His first year is almost over and it's time for you and him to both be able to bond with each other and get the mommy son bond that is just as special as a father daughter bond. I continue to pray for you and him. Things can only get better and they will for you.

If you want I can leave 50 random comments in order for you to fulfill your 50 comment need. ;-) hahaha

Everyone goes through blog breaks, I don't take it personally. Even though we are super moms we can't always do everything! I'll continue to check up on you and the family.

Boom said...

I WILL pray.

And better FIVE loyal readers who will pray and support you than FIFTY fair weather commenters....right?!

Hang in there, friend!

The Partins said...

You may want to consider donor breast milk? I know it sounds icky but it might be the only thing he can drink for now if he is so sensitive to formulas.

Jamie had not even that bad reflux and it made her miserable so I feel for you and yours!

It will get better!!! Hugs!

The Partins said...

Hopefully this one is the one! I sure hope so. I can't even imagine. And that is CRAZY that they made you cut him off from the tap! Go figure. Kids.

I would rather her go at home than at school... let them change her diaper! haha.

And yea...the LAST thing Chumba Wumba over here needs is snacks!!! :-) I mean, she is FINALLY on the growth chart for weight. I mean, 110% is only good in GPAs.

LCP said...

It is so tough not knowing what could be wrong and you so wish he could tell you where it hurts or how...guessing is so trial and error.

Good luck, I sure hope you find a resolution quick...it is really trying on you when you have a crying baby and a competitor!

Jack seems to have progressed out of the colic/reflux stage, thus being sure it was colic...we had a bout last week and I completely forgot how hard it is to keep your patience!! I will pray for you Kimmy!!

Chris said...

call me girlfriend. I just posted tonite too....miss you!

The Kept Woman said...

I'm just catching up b/c like you I found more important things in life than reaching a 50 comment per post dream.

I'm not sure what all had gone on but I'm going back to read. I'm gathing that Bowden is having issues to say the least. Have you tried using an Amby to help him sleep? If you aren't familiar with it, check it out on-line- Amby Motion Bed. They're like $250 but you can probably dig one up on Craigslist for about half that (we just sold ours on C-list). I'm sure this is the last thing you need- ONE MORE PIECE OF ADVICE but a friend of mine swears by hers and not all doctors/medical people know about this as a way to assist the baby to have an easier way to keep that ick down and keep them pain-free....off to read now.

Anonymous said...

So sorry that you're going through this with your son. One day you wont even remember these days. Just a suggestion - once he turns one, I would ask for an allergy test, as well as have him tested for celiac disease. It's an allergy to gluten, which is in everything, and it makes your digestive track miserable. A gluten free diet can be a challenge, but it's becoming more common, and you'll child will feel a million times better if this is what he has.

An allergy test is pretty simple, and you'll have a list of anything he's even slightly allergic too. And in many cases he'll grow out it, so you'll only have to follow the allergy diet for a few years. Good luck!!